140 Children

My student teaching is going splendidly! :D I absolutely love the school, my mentor teacher (and all the 8th grade faculty, really), and most of all, all 140 kiddos we see everyday. Yes, you read that right, 140 kids, each around 14 years old. If that seems like a large number, it is. That works out to 35 students in each class. Way more than there should be, especially in a room that isn’t all that big. Ms. Eliason has told me that in her first year of teaching she had 24 students. The number slowly increased, and has fluctuated over the years, now settling at a number that isn’t ideal and yet could be worse.

They are really fantastic kids, all with so much potential. One has already given me a hug. One has these big, brown, gorgeous eyes that are pretty much capable of looking into my soul (though I won’t tell her this for fear that she’ll realize the power she holds). One gives me high fives every now and then. One is a class clown, always participating in class discussion but taking time to tell a little comical story with each answer. One is impossibly frustrating, but not openly defiant. One is quite possibly a genius. One seems to be asleep all the time with his head resting on the desk, but he’ll frequently pop up and answer a question, out of nowhere.

I could talk about them all day to anyone who will listen. Any teachers reading this will surely not be surprised - all our kids are fascinating. Middle schoolers are especially fascinating because so many changes happen to them in such a short span of time. Physically, they are going through the joys of puberty. Some are tall enough to pass for a substitute teacher. Some are tiny enough to look like they are lost and need to be returned to their fourth grade class.

In terms of maturity, they are making decisions about who they want to be and what they value. While some are getting more involved with their churches and school sports, others are hanging out with peers who will only bring them down. They are deciding its cool to get suspended for fighting or bullying or stealing. They need to break the cycle, but when their parents don’t help matters and their older siblings don’t set a good example, they take the easier path. Those are the ones that break my heart.

Many of them, in two of our classes in particular, are on IEPs (Individual Education Plans). These are legal documents that specify that the child has been tested for disabilities and needs certain accommodations and/or modifications in order to perform well in a classroom. Cerebral Palsy, ADHD, Bipolar, you name it and one of our kids is dealing with it. Some of them are not much different than any other kid, while others are really struggling. Meanwhile, some kids who are not on an IEP really, really, really ought to be. They are just barely keeping their heads above water.

Some kids are soaking up the knowledge and skills that we teach them, showing us that they are learning all the time. Others look frightened and lost, knowing that something is expected of them but not knowing what to do. Are they learning? If not, why? What can I do? Others are bored to tears, academically way past the majority of their classmates and hoping for a challenge. How can I keep them engaged in the day’s lesson?

There is so much to try to wrap my brain around. One thing I am sure of, however, is that these kids are all loveable. Even the frustrating ones. And they work hard everyday, even if that means just showing up and listening. This has got to be the most rewarding job in the world.

My First Days of School

***Please note that most of this was written several weeks ago, around the end of August. Things have gotten pretty busy around here since then. :)

The first day of school always carries a certain mystique about it, at least it does for a nerd like me. My hopes are high for a super-spectacular year and the possibilities are limitless. I sorta make resolutions, the way people do on New Year’s Eve. Maybe this will be the school year that I find a way to balance everything - school, family, friends, exercise, hobbies, (dare I say?) relaxation. Maybe this will be the year I don’t show up to all my classes late or almost late. Whether it’s truly evident to my classmates and teachers or mainly exists in my mind, I seem to have this reputation as the chick who runs into class at the last minute, out of breath, looking like crap.

At any rate, motivation is high just before the start of another school year. I’m excited to see my friends in class after the long summer and no assignments have been handed out yet...I guess it really isn’t that different for a 6-year-old or a 24-year old in this way!

This year the feeling was heightened, because this year I will be putting much of my studies into real-world practice. Everything that I have learned, everything I was supposed to have learned, and everything I have yet to learn - all of it, with any luck, will go to helping real-live children do some learning of their own. This fall, I am a student teacher.

If you don’t know what a student teacher is, the description is in the title. I am still a student, but I’m very close to being a teacher. I have my bachelor’s degree and am working on my masters, while also doing the training for certification to teach English at the secondary level (middle school or high school). My student teaching is a semester-long internship at a local school and one of the last steps I take to become fully certified (certified to teach that is, though I may go a little insane in the process...). I will be shadowing an experienced teacher everyday, observing her and the students in the classroom and school environment. I’ll then gradually take over many of the teaching responsibilities to the degree that she and I are comfortable. I will have to do at least three weeks of full-time teaching and all the responsibilities entailed.

This is go-time. This is where it all comes together. My college courses have taught me a great deal, but that does not add up to much compared with actual classroom experience. It’s both exhilarating and nerve-wrecking, to be truthful. A friend has told me that I will learn more in this semester than in almost all of my college classes combined. Mind you, this is nothing negative against OU...it’s just that there is so much that has to be experienced and cannot really be simulated in a collegiate atmosphere.

Oh, and did I mention that all of this is free labor for the district? Yeah, I don’t get paid. That’s one reason why so many preservice teachers end up getting certified alternatively, because they understandably cannot go several months without an income (and it’s awfully hard to work while also student teaching, though some have pulled it off). Luckily my hubby can support us, and clipping coupons is a favorite pastime of ours anyway.

The good news is that this internship is also an extended job interview at the school. The teachers and I will be seeing a lot of each other and learning if I am truly a good fit to work at this school. If all goes well, I may be lucky enough to get a job offer in the spring or next fall, if they are hiring. I will certainly fight for a teaching job here in Norman, and the first step is working hard during these upcoming months.

So. That’s how it all works. Nervous for me? I sure am. One of my professors reminded all of us student teachers that we are college graduates and we are capable. I think I needed that.

The hubby and I returned from a trip about a week prior to the start of classes and this is also when I found out where I would be student teaching, who my mentor teacher would be, and what grade level of students. Yeah, I know, nothing like waiting until the last minute, right? The schools, the district, and everyone has to coordinate to set up these student teaching placements, so it can be a long and arduous process. Also, and I didn’t know this before, we at OU are competing with other universities around the state for many of the same placement spots in Norman schools...I guess everyone wants to be here!

Initially I was placed at Irving Middle School, with Carol Wahpepah as my mentor teacher, in an 8th grade language arts classroom...Based solely on the grade level, I was immediately disappointed. I had been hoping for a high school assignment. I had indicated only high schools on my list of preferences when I filled out the form to student teach. Quite frankly, I had expected to get assigned to one of the high schools. I had always thought that OU tried to give you a middle school experience and a high school experience, so that you could try them both on for size. I loved the 7th-graders that I observed at my field experience at Whittier Middle School this past spring. They were positively adorable! But I was psyched for high schoolers this time around.

So I did what any overeager rookie does, especially one that thinks first with her heart and then with her head as I do - I went straight to my advisor’s office the next day, a Monday afternoon. No appointment or anything, just showed up. I was tired of only communicating through email and just wanted to talk this through. Of course he was busy when I first arrived, talking with another student about her dissertation (Hi, Kimberly!). I waited outside for my turn and then calmly explained that I was “a little upset” about this placement. He then explained the rationale as such: 8th grade is as close as I can get to high schoolers if I want to student teach this fall. Many new teachers have been hired recently at the two local high schools, and they cannot take on a student teacher until they themselves have been teaching for awhile. It isn’t fair to them or me; the idea is to give us a highly experienced teacher to learn from and one who won’t consider me a burden to their own growing pains. Also, there are four middle schools here and that means more openings, both for student teaching placements now and for jobs (hopefully) afterwards. Moreover, by doing my first field experience in a 7th-grade classroom and my student teaching in 8th grade...that gives me lots of training in the middle school environment, making me more appealing to a middle school looking to hire someone.

I accepted this explanation. It made sense to the rational part of my brain. At this point, I started getting excited again for the placement. It may not have been my first choice, but then again my life seldom goes as expected, and the changes have overwhelmingly been for the better. I read about my mentor teacher on the school website and looked at the reading list for Norman Public Schools and that’s when I saw it. A single book title. One word: Night. As in, the novel by Elie Wiesel chronicling his experiences in the Holocaust, and the first book that haunted me, grabbing hold of my soul as I read. I was in 10th grade, the only Jewish girl in my class, when I read it. I was now beyond excited that my 8th graders would get to read this and that I would get to reread it, seeing their reactions to it at the same time.

The hubby and I went away for another quick trip out of town, one last hurrah for the summer. As such, I had no time to meet with my mentor teacher before Monday last week...more on that in a second. :)

We got back Sunday evening last week. Orientation for student teachers was Monday morning at the Sam Noble Museum of Natural History. There were maybe 60 or 70 of us, from all subject areas, in the auditorium, though I am terrible at judging numbers of people in a given room. We were all excited and nervous to begin this new journey. The dean of the college spoke to us and noted that we have the potential to have an impact on thousands of lives...thanks, that really helps with the nerves! But, of course, it’s also very exciting. The one thing I’ve always wanted to do with my life, in some small way, is make a difference. Teaching is the best way to do that, and in spite of any nerves, I am sooooooo excited! Then last year’s Oklahoma Teacher of the Year spoke with us and shared some of her stories. I think she really put many of us at ease, for some reason I can’t even pinpoint...just the fact that she knew what it was like to be in our shoes. :D

I got some lunch after orientation, and opened my wallet to discover that I had been driving without a license. When travelling, my camera bag often doubles as my purse and I put my ID and a money inside. Not having that bag with me, I was just lucky to have a credit card so that I wasn’t stuck paying for Bison Witches with dishwasher duty. Anyway, this gave me the perfect excuse to run home and get my ID, along with much needed hugs from my husband. He is really my rock. When I need support and my world feels like it’s spinning a little too fast, he is there for me and I am grateful.

Next it was off to Irving! I arrived to find that my fellow student teacher, Jordan, was right when she said it was under construction. Of course, I had expected a portion of the building to be under construction, maybe a single hallway or something, but no. In fact, the entire building is being remodeled, with wires hanging from the ceiling, wet paint on the walls, ladders and equipment here and there. I really wondered how kids were supposed to start showing up in two days. Couldn’t they have picked a better time to do this? Say, I don’t know, summertime??

I met with my mentor teacher, who seemed glad to see me. One of the first things she said was that it was odd that my advisor had referred to her in the email as an eighth grade teacher. She used to teach eighth grade but was teaching seventh grade this year....

Crestfallen once again. This was beginning to feel like a roller coaster ride.

I did my best to hide my disappointment. We talked a bit more and I helped her do a few things to set up her classroom. They had only been allowed into the building a couple days ago due to the construction, so every teacher was scrambling. In her words, they had all agreed “to plaster smiles on our faces and get through this construction, knowing that it’s worth it”.

That’s what I was doing, too, plastering a smile on my face. I told myself that it would still be a great experience no matter what. Seventh graders here, at this Title 1 school on the other side of the railroad tracks, would be a little different. And I wasn’t blaming my advisor, the district website still had her listed as an eight grade teacher. Besides, I hate causing any trouble, and I felt like it would all be just fine.

Thankfully my husband stepped in again when we got to discuss it that evening. Reminding me that this was my career we were talking about and that I would only get one shot to student teach, he said I should at least let my advisor know the situation. One polite email later, he did feel badly for the error and said he would do what he could. I resolved to make the best of it if I was to stay put and yet hope for a last-minute switcheroo to an eight grade classroom.

Tuesday was a kind of open house for the incoming sixth grade students, fresh from elementary school and mostly scared out of their gourds. Ms. Wahpepah and I did some more work to set up her classroom while the kids and parents toured the school. Then, after lunch, I came back to another surprise, but this time it was the one I was hoping for - I now had a home in an eighth grade classroom! :D Ms. Wahpapah understood that my two internships shouldn’t be at the same grade level and joked, “You’re fired.” I’m still not sure if it was Ms. Wahpepah or my advisor who did the work to get things changed, but at any rate I was set up to student teach for Ms. Maren Eliason now. Same school, different hallway. It happened really fast, but I thanked Ms. Wahpapah for everything and took off. I texted my husband that I had been “promoted” to eight grade, and went to meet my new mentor teacher.

So, the roller coaster ride was finished on a high note - or maybe the ride was just beginning, depending on your perspective. Stay tuned. :D